Does Making Do Wear You Down?
Posted on 03. Feb, 2010 by Forest in General, Saving Money & Finances
When you don’t have very much money or you are working hard to be frugal then making do will undoubtedly be something that you find yourself doing on a daily basis.
Making do with holes in your socks, with shoddy kitchen equipment, a car that doesn’t start when it’s cold and much much more. If you have children then the situation can feel far more depressing, especially if they are pushing you for the latest video game console, the latest sneakers or pocket money to go and do things with their friends.
Making do really can be a wearing process but whilst you have to do it it’s important to work out why you are doing this and who for.
I think it’s very important to write all if this down. Sit down with a pen and paper and work out exactly why you are doing this. Reasons could include simply not earning enough money, being swamped with debt or saving for a better future.
If you don’t earn enough then now may be the time to get a second job. This may result in you making do in other areas as you may find yourself hardly at home but you could just work the second job until you find a better position for your main employment.
If in debt you could seriously look at your options. I am currently going through a debt management plan and although it’s hard it is great to feel less pressure and have less outgoings than before the plan.
Saving for a better future means that you are aiming for an end to your making do…. Set a timescale and build in times to splurge a little here and there.
In all cases it’s likely you will feel that Making Do is the right thing to do so make sure you explain it properly to any friends, family or partners. If you have kids then pay special attention here and if the opportunity arises, make sure you spoil them before you spoil yourself. You can also make it a game for them to help you save and see how well the whole family can do.
Knowing that you are making do for the right reasons means that you have a good state of mind to fight off the wear that it pushes upon you. Make sure you list your reasons and put them somewhere prominent like the fridge or an important cork board. Tell your children and loved ones that you are feeling upset, don’t hide things from anyone. Almost everyone knows what it feels like to make do and you will find support.
I personally have gotten to the point where I enjoy being frugal and often make do. Keeping an enjoyment factor and sometimes making it a game to see just how much you can save really helps keep the positive vibes flowing.
Also jump online and find others in your situation. There are tons of frugal blogs just like this blog with all sorts of awesome frugal advice, funny stories and ideas to do nice things whilst making do.
Remember make do today so you can let loose a little in the foreseeable future.
Often the only other option is a future of never ending spiraling debt and just more and more upset. So bite your lip and get through it, it will all be worthwhile!
Your comments on this matter are more than appreciated.
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Anna
03. Feb, 2010
Personally I think that it is very important not to skip items of necessity, basic comfort, and self-respect. And it’s even more important not to skip investments, large or small, which are used in order to increase income and/or expand business goals.
Yes, in a time of tighter budgets I would definitely skip frozen meals and expensive lattes, fancy gadgets, and other nice-to-haves.
But for example: When I live in the forest with a bad connection, even on a budget, I set aside a certain amount every day for the internet cafe. I work there full time and consider the cost of my coffees to be a business expense. Otherwise I kill my income due to the bad internet connection.
Another example – even when very strapped for cash, I one day went to the local mall to prepare for a job interview. New clothes, manicure, new haircut, accessories. Okay I got things on sale but I relaxed my budget considerably because I wanted to look and feel good during the job interview. It was more of a business expense in those circumstances.
I also think one should never skip on small expenses which make a big difference in how you feel. If you are sitting there in rags, even if you are working from your bedroom, you just don’t feel as good. I found that I was accomplishing more on my online business when I got new (though inexpensive) clothes, and did my hair and makeup before “work” every day. Even when my “office” was a multi-colored basement room with cloth walls (though that is another story …)
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Forest
04. Feb, 2010
Hi Anna,
I agree you need to take some comforts. If you have your own business like we do then business expenses are a must and I am the same…. Even though I have stable net connection at home I get bored and find it’s more productive to go and spend money on coffee a few times a week and work out of the house.
I guess clothes are not a big deal to me but feeling comfortable in them is important… Looking good though is not my speciality and I am often prompted when it’s time to buy new rags
!!!
Thanks very very much for your comment.
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Valentina
15. Feb, 2010
Hi Forest,
First time here – found you via Melvin’s.
There is a difference between “make do” and being frugal. Frugality is a form of money management, being frugal may mean that you shop at outlet stores rather than the flagship ones, buy day old bread, no name brands, buying only what you can pay for vs putting it on the plastic never never plan. Often the monies saved then provide for a nice little luxury – a bigger downpayment for a home as an example, or a holiday to someplace instead of camping yet another summer.
In my view, “making do” is doing without. It is because you do not have the money so you may have to eat bread without butter, having just two pairs of pants to wear, and so on. Making do out of necessity is fine, but if continued it can become a debilitating habit. You begin to deprive yourself of small pleasures and self gifts. You do not live life to the fullest.
I know of at least one person who always “made do” and we all thought that he was a very poor man. He had electricity but would go to sleep early in the winter rather than turn on the light. He walked everywhere (now this may not have been a bad thing
)and remarked on my bike and how lucky I was to have one.
This man was a contemporary of my parents. He lived alone with a herd of goats. For some reason he fed them acorns (maybe they liked them). We kids would go and gather acorns and bring cans and cans of them to him. He paid us with great care – counting out the money one coin by one coin. In the meantime mom would often make some extra soup and take it over to him. I often wondered if it was because she felt that he should not have to pay for those acorns. I guess the acorns lasted through the winter and he sold the milk to whom, I do not know. There was a dairy close by, so maybe they used it to make cheese but I never had any so I don’t know.
One day he died. It was winter and his hut was cold. The stove appeared not have been used for some time. The surprise was that he had jars and jars of money, bills rolled up and stuffed into the jars. Coins filled to the rim of a jar. What made him this way? My parents knew him when they were children. They grew up together. Mom told us that this man was a happy child and teen and it was only when he started to live on his own that he began to be such a penny pincher, making do, when apparently he did not need to.
It’s a sad story and I am often reminded of it when people talk of “making do”.
Hmmm…. this ran away, I was just going to post a sentence or two. I guess the “Make Do” struck a cord.
I think it is better to look for ways to make money than for ways to save money … and I don’t mean take a second job. Look for ways that you can increase your income by either getting a better job or having your own part time business that you can work from home and build up over time. Then balance that out with good money management – always pay yourself first, that is what you “save” and never spend except to invest in something that will pay you money, and alsoo put at least a little something for a little bit of fun otherwise your inner child will feel deprived and will shrivel up and die just making do.
.-= Valentina´s last blog ..Sunday Morn Musings: Valentine’s, Gung Hay Fat Choy & The Smell of Gold =-.
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Forest
15. Feb, 2010
Hey Valentina…. Thanks so much for your very thoughtful comment.
The man you knew seems to have lived an extremely common story that I have heard many times….. As it’s so common it just shows how penny pinching can become a strange mental condition. I hope he didn’t pass away angry or with dementia… He may actually have been very happy with his life!
As you say if you can give yourself some comforts then do and if you are not using your money then it should be going to help others…. Too many people hoard money and never help others
…. They say 90% of the world’s money is owned by 10% of the population.
I have to make do in some ways as have debts I am resolving, however I still take time to eat out occassionally or go on the odd short trip to keep my sanity!
As for earning extra cash, Jeff from Deliver Away Debt is an awesome example of actually getting another job. He just earned over $400 from Pizza Delivery this weekend. Here is his blog link: http://deliverawaydebt.com/
I hope to see you around more often.
Forest.
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Isabelle
18. Feb, 2010
I work as a volunteer in a charity shop that raises money for a good local cause. One day a couple brought in a deceased parents belongings, they just emptied the drawers and cupboards into bags and dropped it off. One of the bags contained an enveloped addressed to the dead person – much to the family’s eventual relief.
Most of the old ladies clothes were neatly folded and stored in plastic bags. As we unpacked the items we discovered wads of £1000 at the centre of each. One after the other we found until the whole lot were unpacked – £60,000!
We phoned the police who took the envelope and the cash, and went off to find the owners of the money. The police had contacted them and asked such strange questions that they wondered what on earth was going on. However, they were established as the legal owners of the money and made a substantial donation.
The family said they believed the lady to have been poor and she had been given help that she had always insisted she didn’t need!
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Forest
18. Feb, 2010
Hey Isabelle that is a very interesting story! It’s amazing how many people just don’t use their money…. I wonder if there is an official term for it!
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Jacq @ Single Mom Rich Mom
24. Sep, 2010
Forest, my dad is very much like Valentina’s description of the money-hoarder. Unfortunately I seem to have inherited or been influenced too much by this extreme frugality thinking.
But I’ve made up my mind to mend my money hoarding ways. I realize most people may think it’s easy to spend more because they don’t have the voice in their head that tells them it’s wrong, but it’s not.
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Forest
26. Sep, 2010
Hey Jacq, well acknowledging an issue is always a positive step and I am sure that you can find a medium balance. I work way too long, prying myself away from the work computer is hard at the end of every day but hey I am working at that too…. We all have battles to overcome!
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